Snickers
by Toazzy-chan
Summary: O.o "Ino?" O.o "You're smoking snicker bars?" AU. OOC. Randomness. No real plot. Just craziness. No flames. Rated T for potty mouthed children. Lolz!


Disclaimer: I do NOT own Naruto.

Warning: Total randomness. Makes no real sense. OOC......Like majorly for two characters! Sai farts. You have been warned. No flamers. They shall be flamed right back. If flamed by someone who's signed out, I will find out who you are and I will flame you, for flaming me. REVENGE SHALL BE MINE!!! *coughs* Sorry. Mood swings. **

Please do not try to make sense of that last sentence unless you are a female.

Thank you. That is all. Now scroll down and read the story.

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"SAKURA!!!! CODE RED!!!!! CODE RED SAKURA!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Ino Yamanaka's voice came blaring from the other side of my bedroom door. Only to be followed shortly by the sound of Ino kicking in said door. I could hear her footsteps racing over to my bed, where I _**was**_ trying to fall back asleep. Then something hard landed on my back. "SAKURA!!!!!!! THIS IS NO TIME TO BE SLEEPING!!!!! I'VE GOT A CODE RED EMERGENCY HAPPENING AS WE SPEAK!!!!!! WAKE YOUR LAZY ASS UP AND HELP OUT YOUR BESTEST BEST FRIEND IN THE ENTIRE WORLD!!!!!! NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" (A/N: Lolz! Couldn't resist the caps, with Ino yelling and all...XD)

I had it! She was not only bouncing up and down on my back, while yelling at the top of her lungs at me, but she poured something on my head to top it off! I forcefully sat up on my knees, knocking her to the floor in the process. "WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT?!?!?! IT'S FOUR IN THE MOTHER FUCKING, DUCK HUMPING, ASS GRABBING MORNING!!!!!" Her eyes did this: O.o

(A/N: Lmfao! Again...couldn't resist having caps when they're screaming at the top of their lungs. XD I'm pure evil)

After a moment of silence, she burst out laughing. My left eye twitched when she started to roll around on my floor clutching her sides tightly. When she started crying from said laughter, a vein pooped in my head. Yes I said pooped, not popped. "Ino? Did you come over here just to wake me up and laugh in my face?" She must have noticed my irritated tone and the fact that I grit my teeth when I spoke to her, because she stopped laughing and got a serious look on her face.

"Actually, I came over here because I just found out from the whore herself, Temari, that she has a date with Shikamaru TONIGHT!!!!" I sighed in obvious disdain and gave her my most sarcastic concerned face I could come up with at four in the morning. "First global warming! Now this! What are we to do?!" My sarcastic tone went unnoticed by her and she continued her rant about sabotaging the date.

Around noon, she finally stopped her rant and stated something stupider than Naruto could have said at a time like this. "Hey Sakura?" She pouted and I rolled my eyes. "What now, Ino?" She scooted closer to me and her stomach let out a loud growl. It took me by so much surprise, that I fell out of my bed and onto the floor. "I'm hungry. Let's go meet everyone at Ichiruka's." (A/N: Ichiruka's is the Ramen Stall, right? Please correct me if I'm wrong.)

Generally, I was about to say no to the whole idea, but my stomach just had to make an even bigger noise than Ino's had seconds ago. I sighed for the second time that morning and solemly got up from my floor. "Fine, but I'll just meet you there. I still have to shower and get dressed. Okay?" She nodded her head eagerly and raced out of my room. "Five. Four. Three. Two. One." Ino burst into my room again and snatched her purse from my bed, then she raced back out of my room and the front door of my apartment.

Once I was completely sure she wouldn't come running back into my house, I sighed and got the things I needed for my shower ready. Shower done, hair dried & straightened, and make up on. My make up consisted of black eyeliner, hot pink lipgloss, and black mascara. I slipped on a tank top that ended about two inches below my b-cup chest. Then I slid on my hot pink jacket, that ended in the same area. After I had my top on, I pulled on my black hip-hugging cargo pants, along with my black converse and my black and white baseball cap.

Finally, I was completley dressed. I quickly grabbed my school backpack and raced down the apartment stairs and out onto the streets. my feet carried me down the familiar path to Ichiruka's, while my mind was being blasted away by the song Birdwalk (by Souljaboy) on my ipod. Walking down the street, I couldn't help but start dancing to the song. Everyone around me just ignored the strange show I was giving them.

I made it to Ichiruka's but kept dancing since the song had just started. I knew all of rookie nine, Team Gai, all our senseis, Tsunade, Shizune, and of course the owner of Ichiruka were watching me in my craziness. When the Akatsuki showed up in their ANBU uniforms, I just _**had**_ to turn the volume up on it and place the headphones around my neck. Not to mention I _**had **_to put the song on repeat and play it again from the start.

Ino started cheering when I started to break dance to the song. I spun from hand to hand and back onto my feet again, just in time to birdwalk with the song. Everyone watched me go crazy and gasped when the Akatsuki started to dance the same moves I was. Ino soon followed, along with the rest of the girls. By now, people from the street started to pile into the small ramen shop to watch the free show.

As if things couldn't get any more bizarre, at the end of the song, the girls and I partnered up with a member of the Akatuski ANBU. The guys acted like they were causing our chests to rise and fall to the beat at the end of the song. Then we all fell to the ground at once. The song ended and I turned my extremely loud ipod off and we all laughed. "SAKURA!!! THAT'S PERFECT!!! IT'S THE MOST BRILLIANT PLAN ANYONE COULD HAVE COME UP WITH!!! YOUR THE BESTEST BEST FRIEND ANYONE COULD EVER HAVE IN HER LIFE!!! I LOVE YOU!!!"

My laughter stopped abruptly when she shouted that at me. "Ino? Are you smoking something? Cause if you are, I want some!" She gave me the classic 'wtf?!' look and shrugged. "No! Of course I'm not smoking something! Even if I was, I wouldn't give you any!" Cue puppy dog pout. "Sakura! That's not gonna work on me!" Intensify puppy dog eyes and make lip poutier. "Fine! Just make it stop! Here! Take it!" She shielded her eyes and chucked a small paper bag at my face.

I caught it with ease and looked inside. O.o "Ino?" O.o "You're smoking snicker bars?" O.o _**THUD!!!**_

Yep. I fell to the ground anime style with a loud thud. I laid there for a little while and just twitched. Ino and everyone else thought it was hilarious and started laughing their happy asses off. Itachi Uchiha then did something unforgivable. He stole the damn snicker and lit it on fire! Then he stuck the non-flaming end in his mouth and sucked on it! Smoke came out of his mouth and he blew it in Ino's face. "None for you." That's all he said before walking away smoking a damn snickers bar. Ino apparently couldn't get over the shock that _the_ Itachi Uchiha, stole her snickers and walked away smoking the stupid thing. (A/N: Not for sure if you can really smoke a snickers bar, but it sounded funny to me. LOVE SNICKERS!!!! They will make you fat and happy! XD Lolz! I'm not fat, or happy. Itachi stole my snickers too! T~T)

I, however, recovered quickly and ran after said Uchiha. Once I spotted him, I ran and tackled his snicker-smoking, gorgeous ass. He made the mistake of turning before I tackled him and I ended up stradling his chest. My arms grabbed the snicker from his hand and then I inhaled the damn thing. The poor snicker bar never saw it coming before it was to late. My eyes glared at Itachi, as Hinata pointed an accusing finger at me and shouted. "YOU KILLED HIM!!!!! YOU KILLED POOR SNICKERS IN ONE EVIL BITE!!!!! YOU MONSTER!!!!!!"

Considering she always stuttered, but didn't stutter once in that entire small rant, everyone made faces like this: O.o

My face was more like: XP

Itachi's was like: ^.^

Hinata's face was like: T~T

Itachi moved. I fell. He pinned me. Hinata kicked him in the head. He fell. She ran. I ran the opposite direction. We ended up back where we started. We gave each other a freaked out look and ran passed each other, screaming like chickens with our heads cut off. Again we ended up in the same place. We ran right into each other. We fell. We twitched. Itachi got up. Itachi glared. Everyone laughed like lunitics. Sai farted. I laughed. Hinata fainted. Itachi fell anime style.

Itachi and I recovered. Evil look at Ino. Ino throws ten brown paper bags in the air and runs. Itachi and I wrestle for the bags. I win. Itachi pouts. Hinata wakes up. Akamaru barked. Crickets chirped. "SNICKERS!!!!!!!" Hinata kills me for the snickers. Tsunade brings me back to life. Itachi and I cry anime style. Gai and Lee do a Good Guy Pose. Twitch. Chirp. Evil laughter from behind a dumpster. Icha Icha book bursts into flames. Girly scream emits from Kakashi. Sai farts again. Everyone else walks away from the scene of the random crimes.

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Owari

Fin

The End

(of a random meaningless story with no plot at all)


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